So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
note to self, drunkenly bedazzeling the silverware was a stupid fucking idea
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize
