i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
a search helicopter?!
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
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