Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
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