So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
