This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
Fuck twitter. Fuck men. Fuck bras. Fuck flip flops. Fuck makeup. Fuck perfume.
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
Randomize
