are you still at the devil's house?
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
In Vegas, have spent the last 48 hours wearing a viking helmet and fanny pack. I consider this to be a career high since drinking is my career
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
So I just sent my ex a video snap chat of me getting head from some Venezuelan hottie with the caption I still love you. Think she'll take me back?
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
Randomize
