I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
Randomize