I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
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