I left the party when things started to get crazy... and when I say crazy I mean: there was puke on the carpet, Evan was passed out behind a plant, Mary was making out with her ex while her present bf was making out with Nancy. Not to mention that someone fisted the wall. Also - someone is sleeping on your lawn - they might be dead, I didn't check. Later.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
There are leaves in my underwear?
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize
