My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
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