I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
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