I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
woke up to an unread text message i sent to myself: "brreakfdast..pork and ice cream."
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
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