i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
Randomize
