Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
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