And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
i just woke up with two martini umbrellas taped to my nipples... idk how they got there
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
Randomize
