Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
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