All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
The cop busted in, made the music stop, and goes "GUYS LISTEN UP! DRINK, DO DRUGS, HAVE UNPROTECTED SEX, I DONT GIVE A FUCK, JUST QUIET DOWN!" Best. Cop. Ever.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
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