Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
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