i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
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