Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
Randomize
