i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
Randomize
