Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
You handed J your Mayan-pocalypse shopping list and told him he wasn't getting laid unless he brought everything on it. Where is he supposed to get a live goat?!
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
