is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
I cut my penus on the lid.
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
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