Having your wife answer your cell was so lame. Maybe we can talk when you get your phone, your facebook account, and your balls back.
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
he laminated a picture of his dick.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
Randomize
