She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
Randomize
