Your face is a jimmy john
apparently the secret to your success is patron
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
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