I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
Randomize
