i don't like sucking hair
I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
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