Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
You left your underwear on the fireplace
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
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