Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
My dad is sitting where you rode me
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Randomize
