This girl is more easily done than said...
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
Nobody cheats on THIS.
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
