He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
Randomize
