I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
There is a man on the balcony beside me who claims he is a triceratops. He roared and asked me for a cigarette, telling me he'd eat me if I refused. I love college.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
Randomize
