That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
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