I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
All the doctor said was why
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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