this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
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