so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
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