I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
im going to pretend im pregnant so i can eat a lot then i will accidentally fall down the stairs
Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
Randomize
