he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
Randomize
