Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Randomize
