is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
I cut my penus on the lid.
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
Randomize
