Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
Randomize