Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
Randomize
