he shaved USA in his pubs
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
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