It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
and this is why i am such an inspirational person, i am the Joel Osteen of alcoholics.
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
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