exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
My friend wants your phone number so you can teach her how to take a beer bong. She saw you doing them last night and got jealous.
Just tell her to open her throat. I don't want to talk to anyone who is jealous of someone who woke up this morning with a cat in their shirt as a result of that glorious beer bonging skill.
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
