what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
My friend asked me if I got home okay and I replied "Glad teat. Goodnight." Usually I can translate drunk me, but I'm even lost on that one.
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
Randomize
