is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
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