That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
I was about to send you a concerned-for-your-safety text b/c it took you more than ten seconds to respond to a text that mentioned both the bar and lesbians
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
Randomize