I wish i was in the wii world.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
Randomize